When does the dispute become parental alienation?

We constantly hear on social media the term ‘parental alienation’ and all family lawyers will tell you that they have heard those words many times in recent years.

However, when does a dispute about child arrangements actually become parental alienation? In reality, the circumstances need to be extreme before a Court or an expert will decide that the children are being alienated from one parent by the other. It is heartbreaking that this exists, but the Courts are always adapting and becoming more robust in dealing with parents who are unwilling to engage.

Our Clare Campbell details her first handling of a parental alienation case ‘I recall one of my first cases.. a typical contact dispute I thought! However, it soon became clear that the mother would stop at nothing to prevent my client from spending time with the children. One minute the children were ill and couldn’t attend, the next they were going through assessments for ADHD, then she wasn’t sure my client was their father (!!) (they were nearly teenagers.. my client knew they were his children). I recall my client saying to me ‘what will happen next’. In reality, there were more and more issues, week on week and we were constantly returning matters to Court. This of course came at great expense to my client and because the mother was unrepresented, she didn’t feel this strain.

I invited the Court to instruct a children’s Guardian. This is usually a Cafcass Officer who represents the bests interests of the children. Most importantly, they give advice to the Court about what would be most appropriate for the children. It was following her professional assessment that the Court was satisfied that the children were being alienated from their father by their mother. At this point, the mother was given another chance, much to the disbelief of my client. Despite some initial indications that things were finally going to improve, all fell apart yet again when it came time for my client to collect the children. Having already been warned that the Judge would consider a change in where the children lived, the mother was still undeterred and stopped all contact again. At the final hearing, I argued that the children should move to live with their father. He had shown he could meet the children’s needs but importantly, he could support a relationship between the children and their mother. Something she had failed to do and seemed incapable of doing. We were successful and the children did move to live with their father. Although the parties haven’t become best friends, they now have a workable relationship which allows the children to spend quality time with both parents’.

If you feel you are being alienated from your children or you are being accused of alienation, contact our Family Law Team at Metcalfe Copeman & Pettefar who will be able to give you expert advice and if necessary, guide you through court proceedings to secure the best outcome for the children.